Intentions Over Goals
I had the best day the other day. A morning walk and a coffee at the local cafe with the hubby, work running online facilitation sessions and then onto some writing and drawing time. All finished off with a cuddle from the kids. Nothing particularly 'special' or out of the ordinary.
In the evening, as I hung freshly washed clothes in my wardrobe, I thought to myself:
"If today was my last day in this body, on this earth, I'd be happy."
Wow!
I've been lucky enough to feel like this a handful of times in my life. Namely doing a skydive, after which my husband proposed, then the day I married my husband and then the days I gave birth to all of my children.
However, the difference with this particular day was nothing happened. Nada! It was an ordinary day, and yet it felt perfect. As If I had achieved everything. No, correction. I didn't need to achieve anything. I had it all.
This feeling of well-being has followed me for a couple of weeks now.
I've suffered from low mood and depression since I was 14. I've battled mentally for the best part of my 44 years on this planet. So believe me when I say this is not a natural feeling!
I believe this feeling of well-being comes from my decision to pursue a creative and mindfulness practice over seeking out validation and money. It's my mindset that has created the change in me. Life is pretty much as it always was. More challenging in some ways, less in others. It's, well, just life.
Non-Striving is a Choice
The theme I've been exploring this month is non-striving. (I personally feel the 7 mindfulness attitudes are a great way to live our lives and our creative lives). As I’ve contemplated exactly what non-striving means I’ve asked myself:
How do we make progress yet, non-strive?
Does striving mean working or not towards a set outcome?
Does it mean blindly following wherever the path takes you?
Or does it perhaps mean trusting the process, that showing up is enough or is the process?
Now, my drive is to write, draw and continue learning about creativity and the place of mindfulness in it all.
So is the urge to draw or create a form of striving? Once I finish a drawing, even before finishing actually, I'm planning the next one, always learning from the last.
One crucial fact I've realised though is that I'm practising non-striving because I'm not fixated on the finished piece of work. I'm not creating with some goal in mind. I have an intention and an absolute inherent drive inside me, but I have no fixed point in the future I want to achieve.
It’s the process of drawing I love to practice. The finished pieces are lovely, I love seeing my collection building, but it's the act of drawing that brings me so much satisfaction.
Non-striving isn't goal orientated. It's process orientated.
Rather than striving for the goal, you revel in the process.
Non-striving is setting intentions over goals.
The major difference this mindset has made, in terms of making art, is I’m not worried if a piece I may have spent hours on, doesn’t work out. I shared such a piece on Instagram and it felt liberating. To share what I would have once called a failure and a waste of time. To embrace this drawing as part of the creative journey and be in love with the experience of creating and learning from the process of making it.
Replacing Goals with Intentions
Goals are replaced by intentions because no plan or purpose is guaranteed. The difference is, an intention is infinite and isn't affected by twists and turns in the road. With intentions, whatever happens, you can adapt, which also brings along the added benefit of resilience.
The difference with setting intentions rather than goals is you're not disappointed if things have to change or don't work out as expected. Rather than fixating on a point ahead, you ride freely along the path with a rough direction of where you're going. However, you're prepared to investigate the twists and turns, the dark undergrowth, hidden trails, unusual flora and fauna along the way. Because you know they lead to new and exciting discoveries.
I set an intention to go in a particular direction, but I look at the view along the way from all directions. I rest when I need to or pause when I want to investigate what's around me in further depth. There's no rush. I'm enjoying myself here. I'm open to the twists and turns of the path, of life, without fixating on any destination. Through my art and mindfulness practice, I've learnt that there is no final destination.
“The best way to achieve your goals is to back off from striving for results and instead start focusing carefully on seeing and accepting things as they are, moment by moment. With patience and regular practice, the movement toward your goals will take place by itself. This movement becomes an unfolding that you are inviting to happen within you.”
And that's what I felt that very ordinary day, folding and hanging washing. An absolute sense that whatever happens, I've been enjoying the view. It's beautiful, and if I'm fortunate enough to wake up again tomorrow, I can't wait to explore it more.
Gx